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What to do when someone irritates you

October 31, 2006

The nobleman is a scientific observer of human interactions. When someone rubs you the wrong way, it is important to remain as unemotional as possible and switch to observer mode. When in this mode even your gaze can overcome potential conflict. Your gaze communicates the feeling that you are unmoved by their behavior and are curious as to why they are behaving this way.

In your neverending quest for social mastery, you must begin to love your role as someone who is truly interested in humanity, even segments which you don’t like. The nobleman is not free from dislike or even hate of those who are evil, but it doesn’t affect him like others. The normal man will get a physical reaction, stress, and disrupted thinking from those he hates. The nobleman greets the emotion of dislike or hate from another direction. He looks at it as a scientific observer and decides whether or not it is worth his energy or should he move on to productive activity and interactions. When he makes that decision he will leave the emotion and its accompanying bad side effects behind.

The nobleman has a sensitive moral compass but he does not let evil or dislike affect him in such a way to derail him from his lofty aims. The worst side effect of dislike and hate (besides the physical reactions and stress) is to take precious time away from moving toward one of your many aims.

All of this is of course very difficult. In your quiet moments of reflection or prayer or meditation, try to spend some time, distancing yourself from being invested in dislike and hate, see it being bounced off of you. You don’t have to love those you hate or annoy you, that is unrealistic. The nobleman constantly strives to honestly acknowledge that emotion, takes a look at it as a scientific observer especially in the midst of an interaction, remain detached as much as possible, and move on to better things.

Freely adapted and interpreted based on material from Positive Imaging by Norman Vincent Peale

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From → Interactions

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